Good work Alsy. Thanks for dinner.
Good luck with your new bar in New York Dom!
Poor Jo had a sleep over at our place on Saturday, she took a tumble in the night somewhere and found this on her leg in the morning, with no memory of how it happened. It was weird, very fleshy but hardly any blood, it probably looks worse than it was, 6 stitches and she was fine. We spent the rest of the day playing a real life game of cluedo, the clues she left include:
-A lounge chair from way upstairs was upside down on the stairs
-A Jo sized hand print in the dust on the back of the light shade high above the stairs
-A stiletto heel was stuck in my surfboard, judging by the stompiness of the marks, someone has been hip hop line dancing on it
-The TV movie The Staircase was playing silently on the tv (based on that doco)
-Someone’s cut out the eyes of my Lisa Curry Kenny poster
-Now there’s a very polite American Indian living in the house, a Comanche in fact, who it seems only i can see, his name is ted and he won’t leave and keeps eating all the ice cream (Kinda like in Wayne’s World 2)
-There’s a crudely made yet very effective effigy of Keanu Reeves covered in kerosene hanging in the laundry cupboard
-Oh and someone’s made a massive Jägerbomb in the bath tub
The following items in the house had traces of blood:
-A white bic
-A vintage fire extinguisher full of kerosene
-Lisa Curry Kenny Poster
-Our dog Franks’ mouth
-My Ouija Board signed by Michael Jordan
Sare and I set up a wedding on the weekend that ended up looking pretty amazing. No thanks to me who complained the whole time that i didn’t have a funnel that was absolutely necessary to fill up the bottles and went on to spill water over the whole hall. It looked like a waterpark by the time I was done with it. I asked this guy in the beanie if he wanted to take over from me and be an apprentice florist for the day, he said he’d do it for carton of marlboro reds and a loaf of bread. The milkbar only had ultra lights, which he said were ‘fresher than air’ so i grumpily went back to work.
I ended up in an argument with this speed head jockey. I told him i was doing an expose for Time magazine and that i thought it was wrong for him to jack horses up on amphetamines and that he should look out for a cover story.
I think that’s about a half a whale eye danny
Did you know that Bret Michaels has diabetes?